Adoption

Many couples are choosing to expand their families through adoption. Learn the process and legalities surrounding adopting a child.

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Beginning the Adoption Process
If you have chosen to consider adoption as a way to expand your family, there are many considerations you must make. Adoption help is available on the internet, through agencies, and through adoption lawyers. Utilizing these resources for adoption help will aid you in determining the best way to proceed with your adoption.

The first step in the process is to decide whether you would like to use an agency or adopt privately. During a private adoption, the adoptive parents gain the right to parent the child directly from the birth mother, without the help of an agency. Those using private adoption will use a lawyer to help them go through the adoption process legally.

Others choose to use agencies, which are non-profit third party organizations that help facilitate the adoption. There are two types of adoption agencies that adoptive parents can choose to use: public and private. Public agencies are generally supported through tax dollars and help place children in foster care and then into permanent adoptive families. Private adoption agencies are run without tax aid and often are built around a commonality, such as a particular religious preference. Both types of agencies provide adoption help to both adoptive parents and birth parents. Many forms of international adoption work through private adoption agencies.

Open Versus Closed Adoption
A second choice facing those working towards adopting a child is whether they would prefer an open adoption or a closed adoption. Both types of adoption have their benefits and drawbacks. An open adoption is an adoption where the child grows up knowing the details about the adoption. Also, the adopting parents will stay in contact with the birth mother, letting her know about the child’s development and growth. Often in an open adoption the child will have contact with his or her birth mother. In many situations the child will meet with the birth mother occasionally. This type of adoption allows the child to know his or her medical history, while also helping the birth mother have closure about the decision to place the child up for adoption. However, there is sometimes a conflict of interests between the birth mother and the adoptive parents.

Closed adoptions are the more traditional form of adoption. In a closed adoption, the adopting parents have little contact, if any, with the birth parent. Sometimes the adopting family does not know the name or contact information of the birth mother. This can create problems for the child if he or she decides to contact the birth mother at some point. On the other hand, closed adoptions help the adoptive parents solidify the parent/child bond with the child, with no fear of interference from the birth parent.

Many adoptive parents are choosing a balance between open and closed adoption. While the child may not have frequent contact with the birth mother, there is some exchange of information between the adoptive family and the birth mother. In this way, the child is able to become an integral part of the adopting family, while still having access to medical and genetic history.

What Is the Home Study
Once you have decided what type of agency, if any, you are going to use and what type of adoption you want, you are ready to really begin the adoption process. If you have an adoption guide telling you step by step how to adopt, one of the first things you will see discussed is a home study. The home study is required by law in every state in America, and it serves several purposes. First, the home study helps teach the adoptive parents about the adoption process. It also is designed to gather information about the family to help social workers decide whether or not they are good candidates for adoption. Finally, the home study helps evaluate which child would be a good match for the adoptive family.

The specific requirements of the home study will vary depending on the state and the agency performing the study. However, parents should avoid trying to look like the “perfect” family. Social workers are looking for safe homes for children, not perfect homes. The process can take several months.

The Home Study Process
During the home study, parents will attend training about adopting and the needs of adopted children. Social workers will interview the parents on several occasions to help get a feel for the family. Home visits are an important part of the process as well, and are used to determine whether or not the home is a safe place for children to live. Parents may be asked to take a health examination to determine whether or not they have any serious medical conditions that would make them unfit to parent. All families must produce an income statement that proves they have enough money to feed, clothe, and shelter a child. Background checks, done through fingerprints, are also a part of the home study.

Some parents feel frustrated by the home study process. They may feel that the social workers become invasive during the interviews, and may even want to give up on adopting all together. It is important for these parents to remember that the purpose of a home study is to determine whether or not they are ready for a child, and to find a child that is a good match for the family. The goal is to see a happy family at the end of the adoption process. At the end of the home study process, the social worker will determine whether or not the family is ready to adopt. If approved, the real waiting begins.

Anticipation for a New Child
Once an adopting family is approved for adoption, they must wait to be matched to a potential birth mother or a child looking for a home. This waiting period can be short or excruciatingly long. For instance, parents who are looking to adopt Caucasian newborns can wait for up to five years, whereas parents who are willing to adopt older children and teens can often have a child placed with them in a relatively short time. In many open and private adoption situations, the parents may have to wait for a birth mother to choose them as the adopting parents for her child. The time of waiting is difficult for most parents, but makes the arrival of the new child even sweeter for the expectant family.

In most infant adoptions, both the birth mother and the adopting parents will outline their desires and requirements about the adoption. These will be carefully matched through the agency to help find the perfect match. Adoptive parents who have strict requirements about the child they want to adopt will usually have to wait longer than parents who are a bit more flexible. For instance, parents who specify a gender or race for the child they want to adopt will typically have to wait longer than parents who are willing to adopt a child of any race or gender.

Legal Considerations for Adoptive Parents
Each state has its own specific laws surrounding adoption, and these laws change frequently. For this reason, many adoptive parents choose to have a lawyer help them through the adoption process. One of the best ways to learn about the laws in your state is to follow any adoption news stories you can find. For example, you may need to consider the rights your state gives to the birth father. There have recently been cases in several states where a birth father decides that he wants to parent a child after the birth mother has put the child up for adoption. These can be complicated and heartbreaking situations for the adopting family.

Some of the most important laws you will need to study are the laws surrounding relinquishment of the parental rights. This law may have a different name in your state, such as “Consent to Adoption” or “Voluntary Termination of Parental Rights.” No matter what it is called, you need to know what happens when you are given your new child. In some states the birth mother has some time after the birth of the child before she can sign the adoption papers. In other states, these papers can be signed as soon as the child is born. Remember that until the birth mother has given you, the adoptive parent, the right to parent the child through the proper legal documentation, there is always a chance that she could change her mind. This is one of the most emotionally difficult times for the adoptive parents. However, most situations work out in favor of a successful adoption. Knowing these laws well will protect you from potential scams and emotional heartache.

Special Considerations for International Adoption
Recently, international adoption has become incredibly popular, particularly in the United States. As more and more celebrities are adopting children from across the ocean, other Americans are looking to this form of adoption as a way to grow their families. Even if you are already familiar with how to adopt the traditional way, you need to be aware of the fact that there are other laws surrounding international adoption to consider. Besides going through the legal adoption process as you would if you were adopting an American child, you will also have to work through immigration laws to ensure that your new child comes to the country legally. You will have to apply for a visa for your child before bringing him to America, for example. Most of the time, those looking to adopt internationally will work with an international adoption agency that will be able to help with the necessary immigration paperwork as a part of the overall adoption process. Many of these international agencies provide an international adoption guide to help the parents work through the process step by step.

The Cost of Adoption
Adopting parents have often been told that it costs a fortune to adopt. Many infertile couples do not consider adoption as an option simply because they feel that there is no way they can afford the costs of adoption. There is definitely a cost to consider when adopting, but you do not have to be rich to consider adoption.

In reality, adoption can cost a lot or a little, depending on all of the details of the adoption. Those who adopt privately or through an agency can expect to spend between $5,000 and $40,000 for their adoption. Often there is some travel expense involved in this number, as well as the costs for filing all of the legal paperwork to make the adoption official. International adoption almost always costs more, simply because of the large amount of travel costs and immigration costs involved in the process. Those looking to adopt internationally can expect to pay between $7,000 and $30,000 for the entire process.

Two things you will almost always have to pay for when adopting are the home study and the legal fees. The home study can cost between $1,000 and $3,000, and this fee is charged by the social worker. Sometimes those who adopt through the foster care system will not have to pay much for their home study. Court documentation for an adoption costs between $500 and $2,000, depending on the state, and the legal representation for the adoption can cost between $2,500 and $12,000.

Finalizing an Adoption
So at what point does an adopted child truly become yours? Again, this will vary depending on the laws of the state you live in. In most states, the process of finalizing an adoption takes around six months. At birth, the birth mother will sign the relinquishment papers, giving over the rights of parenting the child to the new parents. However, this does not complete the adoption. The child will be placed in the adopting parents’ home for six months. At this point, the social worker will submit a recommendation for approval of the adoption. Then the family appears before a judge in court to finalize the adoption. At this point, the adopting parents assume all of the rights and responsibilities that would normally be given to the parents of the child. The adoption is complete, and the adopting family has the new child they have anticipated during the long months of preparation and waiting.


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