Helping Children Deal with Grief

Children's first experience of grief over someone's death can be overwhelming to them so it is essential for the adults to teach them how to deal with grief. The suggestions in this article should assist you in helping your child to deal with grief.


When a child loses someone close to him, or even if a favorite pet dies, the grief that ensues can be hard for him to cope with. Death is a natural part of life, but it can be a very overwhelming experience when it first happens for a child. Children need to grieve, just like adults do, and these suggestions should assist you in helping your child to deal with grief. STEP 1: Help the child to find ways to grieve. For most children, death is a new experience and grief is something that they've never had to go through before. It's important that you don't prescribe the path that your child's grieving takes. Instead, offer suggestions and opportunities that will help the child to deal with grief. But have no expectations of the child beyond this. If they're young, grief can be expressed with paper and some crayons. No words need to be said. No therapy session is needed. Just let the child draw what they're thinking about. It's the purest form of dealing with grief that a child can do. Slightly older children may deal with grief through music, written, or spoken word. You can suggest all of these methods to your child, subtly. But just ensure that you are not forcing a certain grief exercise on your child. Each one needs to deal with grief in a personal way. STEP 2: Let the child grieve in ways he is comfortable. Although you may have the best of intentions when it comes to helping children deal with grief, it is important to let it happen in a way that is natural and comfortable (and not forced) for the child. This especially holds true for wakes and funerals. Children shouldn't be forced to attend death rituals if it makes them uneasy about death. If you sense that your child has the slightest misgivings about attending a funeral, don't force the issue. Your child needs to deal with grief in way that suits his own emotions. If that means that he stays with the neighbors while you go to the funeral, that's fine. Everyone will understand and appreciate that you are allowing your children to deal with grief in a natural, comfortable and age-appropriate manner.
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