How to Include the Father of the Bride

Traditionally, the couple should include the father of the bride when it comes to financial decisions, as well as giving away the bride during the ceremony. However, his role in your special day does not have to stop there. If he wants to be included in more aspects of your wedding, here's how to include the father of the bride.


Traditionally, the couple should include the father of the bride when it comes to financial decisions, as well as giving away the bride during the ceremony. However, his role in your special day does not have to stop there. If he wants to be included in more aspects of your wedding, here's how to include the father of the bride:
Wedding planning decisions. Because the traditional role of the father of the bride is to pay for most of the wedding, be sure to include him in the planning stages as much as he wishes. Since he's paying for it, be sure not to ruffle his feathers. Even if he is not footing the bill, it would still be nice to include him in these decisions, if he'd like to be included. Ask about his desired level of involvement early in the wedding planning process. He may wish to be included in visits to potential wedding venues, for example. Music, food, and alcohol are often decisions that you can include the father of the bride in making.

Guest list. Although the mother of the bride will have more of a say over the guest list for the bride's side of the family, it would also be a nice gesture to include the father of the bride in these decisions. You can also ask him to arrange accommodations for out-of-town guests on this side of the family.

The parties. The father of the bride should be invited to the bachelor party, as well as the couple's bridal shower. The father of the bride should also attend the rehearsal dinner, which is traditionally hosted by the groom's parents.

Time to meet the father of the bride. The two fathers should be given ample time ahead of the ceremony date to get to know each other, particularly if they have not had time to do this in the past.

The day of the wedding. Often, the father of the bride becomes responsible for last-minute errands and logistics.

The ceremony. Include the father of the bride in the ceremony, usually by planning for him to walk the bride down the aisle and give her away to her new husband. His role in the ceremony could also include reading a poem or scripture or another symbolic act. Ask the father of the bride about any important family or cultural traditions he'd like to see included in your wedding day.

The reception. At the reception, a special dance should be set aside for the bride and her father. The father of the bride may also wish to give a speech during the reception. If the father of the bride wants an additional task during the reception, you can ask him to monitor the bar, making sure that it is stocked and that it is closed down as the end of the evening approaches.
Even if the father of the bride is not paying for a hefty portion of the wedding expenses as was once required of him, it is important to involve him as much as he'd like in the planning process and in your wedding events. Some brides' fathers prefer a hands-off approach, while others would like to be kept apprised of the decisions at every step of the way.
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