Same-Sex (Gay) Marriage

Same-Sex (Gay) Marriage

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Marriage- Time of Change

By Noor Yacoub, Purdue University

Marriage, is defined as the legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife. But, when one is asked to define marriage in this day and age, what does he/she reply? What does he/she reply now that there are men who are choosing to be united as husbands and women as wives? The controversy in this definition is being questioned today as it seems by everyone form the federal government to the local mayors. The definition of marriage in the present day is a subject to change if the legalization of same-sex marriage is undergone. The question at hand, and the issue that is being debated all over the country, is whether there should be and amendment banning same-sex marriages? There are many positive aspects to this amendment if passed, but then again, there are negative aspects as there is with anything else.


Ban Amendment- Legal Arguments

There are many reasons that support the institution of an amendment banning these kinds of marriages. Same-Sex marriages if not banned will have a significant influence n all aspects of American lifestyle as we know it.

One of the most important reasons is the constitution itself. Some might argue that if there is an amendment passed that bans these marriages, it will contradict with the constitution itself. This is because they consider it discrimination against people, their choices, and their rights. But the President Bush disagrees: “Our government should respect every person and protect the institution of marriage. There is no contradiction between the responsibilities (“Bush”). Not only will it contradict our constitution but it will go against the 19 Defense of Marriage Act that was signed by former President Bill Clinton. This act “prevents the recognition of same-sex marriages, and allows states to ignore same-sex licenses from outside their border (“Bish”). Also, same-sex marriages cannot fulfill the many requirements of a “marriage” (Lattin A1).

So, what is being suggested at this point is “civil unions,” although a majority of Americans oppose to these unions as well (Blanton). But, an archbishop, who opposes to same-sex marriages but a supporter of these civil unions, claims that “changing the definition of marriage to achieve benefit goals is ill advised and harmful to society” (Lattin A1).


Gay Marriage- Religion

Another reason as to why same-sex marriages should be banned is that is not supported by religion. There are many churches and institutions that are in full support of passing an amendment that bans these marriages. The three largest Christian churches, all stands opposed to the same-sex marriages in Christian church or city hall and support the passing of an amendment banning them. Christians are not the only ones who support this amendment, for other religions don’t believe in having same-sex marriages either, for example the Muslims’ Quran does not believe in same-sex marriages (Lattin A1).


Gay Marriage- Alleged Effects on Children

Another important factor that plays a role when people are making their decisions to ban same-sex marriages is when they think of the children that may be brought up in same-sex parent house-hold According to a certain study, children who have grown up with homosexual parents have been reported to have had their first sexual encounter with a person of their own sex, as their parents do. They’re also known to become homosexual themselves or even bisexual. They also admit to having troubled childhoods (“Same”). But, on the other hand, children don’t have to live in homosexual household to be affected by same-sex marriages. They are always at risk of being exposed to homosexuality, for example Ruth Medellin’s 11-year-old daughter asked her mother about a news coverage that featured two women getting married. Ruth didn’t know how to explain the situation, she confesses: “… I’m concerned about the influence, what children see, they’ll want to try out. They don’t know their path yet” (Lattin A1).


Gay Marriage- Constitutional Rights

When talking about the constitution itself, we come to realize many interesting points. Gay couples have made it clear that their strong opposition to the banning of their marriages is not to gain any exposure but people understand that they are too devoted to one another. (Savidge E1) Mark Mead, the director of public affairs for the Log Cabin Republicans states that: “the constitution demands equal protection under the law which also means equal rights and responsibilities” (Savidge E1). So why shouldn’t same-sex couples have to fight for the rights that are automatically handed to opposite-sex couples who marry?

As far as the “civil unions” go, the American public seems to be more supportive of that fact than they are about the actual marriages (Blanton). Opinion Dynamics President, John Gorman, comments on the results of opinion polls of the civil unions: “ It is interesting to note that few years ago ‘civil unions’ were regarded as wildly controversial… Now the whole country is just about evenly divided on that notion, since they see it as an alterative to full marriage, Given the age patterns in the data [I’ve seen], it is hard to see how some form of union wont be the national norm in the future” (Blanton).


It is a Civil, not a religious fight

Mead also makes a stand on religious aspects of the problem. He stresses on the point that just like any church, synagogue, or mosque is not forced to perform any ceremony which they don’t support, “The government should not discriminate against loving, committed couple who wants to marry” (Savidge E1). The gay community seems to find that the entire issue of religion is unnecessary since they emphasize on the point that their fight is for civil rights, not religious (Savidge E1).

When it comes to raising children, it is generally opinionated that a child should be brought up in a home with a man and a woman as their role models. So, they think it seems wrong when there are two men or two women. But, then why are single-parent household still legal if the “right” way to raise a child is with two parents f the opposite-sex?


Expanding the Definition

Another reason is simply misconception. The general conception of marriage is the love and devotion of a man and woman to one another, and raising children. So, with this idea f marriage in mind, it is only natural that anyone would reject the idea of a marriage between two men or two women, and there’s the misconception. What’s the conception when a newly engaged 6-year-old couple who cannot bear and will not raise children? Does that make it wrong? Conceptions can change over time., “they are not written in stone.” So, instead of focusing on the generalizations of marriages and what they ought to be, people should focus on the heart of a marriage. The couple themselves, and how much they care for each other, love each other, commit to each other. That’s what really matters in marriage (Gettings 3).


Same-Sax Marriage- Author Opinion

When it comes to the constitution, I think that it may seem as its contradicting itself when it bans sex-sex marriages but preaches about equality. I do not judge or condemn people who reserve their right to be gay, but I do not consider marriage as one of their rights. This may seem contradicting as well since I feel that they have a right to be gay, but that’s that the way I see it.

The “civil unions” seem like a solution that can satisfy both sides to some extent. It satisfies the public and the government by ruling out the possibility of constituting a marriage between people of the same sex, and it satisfies the gay and lesbian community by giving them most of the right that are given to a couple of opposite sexes except for the right to be legally married.

Personally, I agree with the religion argument where it is noted in that there is no religion that supports the right for people of the same sexes to be married. As a Muslim, that is what I have been taught, that same-sex marriages can never be legal.

Now the fact about children growing up in same-sex homes will grow up to be “unhealthy” emotionally, is a bit controversial to me. I think that a same-sex couple will have the ability to raise a child in a healthy and happy way just like a single-parent household can raise a child. Now, there is a possibility where things may go wrong, but that’s true within any household, even with a mother and father.

After discussing the pros and cons of banning the same –sex marriage, it still remains a controversial issue, and it’ll be that way for possibly years to come. Whether debating about the constitutional aspect, religious aspect, child-raising aspect, or the institution of civil unions, there will be many different views and opinions on all these matters. A permanent decision may not be made for a long time depending on how the proceedings and debates go. Looking into the future, society will be conquered b t the strong will of the same-sex movement, and their marriages will be legal eventually.


Sources

Blanton, Dana. “Majority Opposes Same-Sex Marriage.” Fox News. 21 Nov. 2003.

“Bush Calls for Ban on Same-Sex Marriages.” CNN. 25 Feb. 2004. CNN. 22 Mar. 2004
Cameron, Paul. “Same Sex Marriage: Til Death Do Us Part?” Family Research Institute. 1999. Family Research Institute. 23 Mar. 2004.

Gettings, Michael. “Arguing the Case for Gay Marriage.” Roanoke Times & World News . 28 Mar. 2004: 3
.
Lattin, Don, et al. “Religious Groups on Common Ground; Many Faiths Oppose Same-Se x Marriages.” The San Francisco Chronicle. 14 Mar. 2004: A1
.
Savidge, Mariella. “No, You Don’t; Controversy Continues To Build Over the Right of Gay Couples To Wed.” Morning Call. 9 Mar. 2004: E1



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